I would like to share my personal story of loss and journey to parenthood.
My husband and I unexpectedly found out we were pregnant in 2005, but it was realized early on that the baby didn’t have a strong enough heartbeat. We were told there was still hope, but unfortunately it got weaker and we lost our first angel. We were never given a reason, just told that this kind of thing happens. We began “trying” to have a baby and found it to be harder then expected.
The next 3 years were very challenging and difficult, but finally in 2008 we discovered we were pregnant again. I can’t express the joy we felt after such a long journey, but after a rush to the emergency room we discovered we had had another miscarriage. The most frustrating and upsetting thing was that the doctors again had nothing helpful to say. I remember one doctor told me that I had “bad luck” and when I asked to have testing done before we tried to get pregnant again the doctor said we don’t do testing till you have had three miscarriages. Not willing to take that chance and risk the life of another baby, I switched doctors and requested testing be done on my husband and myself. It was discovered that I had a bloodclotting disorder called antiphospholipid syndrome and unfortunately this causes miscarriages.
Finally, after two miscarriages and with the help of blood thinners, caring doctors, and ultimately God’s hand we had a boy in December of 2009. Not too long after that we had a SURPRISE and in January of 2011 we had another boy! God is so good and I think it is amazing to have an organization that will provide awareness and help to other families who have lost babies or children. My husband and I wish we had had more support, so many people tell us they didn’t know what to do so they distanced themselves (giving us time and space to grieve) and this actually just added to the hurt and feelings of loneliness. Men and women tend to deal with these issues differently (at least we did) and it would have been of great help to have other women to just talk to. I hope my story gives hope to those that are trying to have a baby and comfort (in a small way) to those that have experienced loss.
Lisa (Mother of two angels and two boys that are truly the greatest blessing)